Some people call this gateway to the Mexican Riviera "Mexico's most exciting resort city" ... these are probably the same people who think the rain forrest takes up precious cattle-ranching real estate.

The shrimp bucket, like every other bar in Cancun, is a frat party in a can. The bars are designed so that at any given moment, the MTV crew could show up and get perfect footage of a "party crowd". When we first arrived in Cancun, we signed-up for a tour of the bars and you wouldn't believe the stuff that goes on in there. Most of it is good clean meathead fun. Here you can see Alexis standing behind one of them cut-out things that you stick you face into so that people can take funny pictures.

To your right you'll find one of Cancun's craziest dance clubs, La Boom. Even a bitter cynic like Alexis has to admire the sight of a mighty dance hall thumping and strobing like Travolta's vision of Heaven. They get bonus brownie points for the Dr.Who-style phone booths.

Inside La Boom you'll find hundreds of moderately cute and extremely under-dressed girls, such as the one pictured here. California is probably the rave capital of the United States, so I think a lot of kids from other parts of the country like Cancun because it gives them a taste of the underground, over-produced dance scene that we glorify on TV.

Although there are no native species of elephants in Mexico, Maria managed to pose alongside an animatronic pachyderm that she found inside the rain forrest café. The entire hotel strip of Cancun is covered with expensive American franchises, you won't hear anyone complain about not finding a decent burger around those parts.

We did manage to find some tasty Mexican food when we wondered into Cancun City, away from the trendy strip. Not all of it was good, but most of it was, none of it made us sick, and people treated you like a human being, not like walking ATM machines. They even had a Walmart there that sold stuff for very cheap!

All things considered, Alexis would advise you to stay away from Cancun unless you're the sort of person who really likes hanging-out at the MGM Grand or Cezar's Palace. The only thing that made that part of the trip worth it for him was the insanly powdery white sands of the beach along the strip, the stuff is unbelievable.